How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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