Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
