Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
