I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
