...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
