Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
