i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
