just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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