If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
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