I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Are we still banned from the library?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize