honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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