Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
