yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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