I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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