all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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