i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize