tell your sister to shave her snatch
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
