just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
