yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
