I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
