Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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