I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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