that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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