Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
