Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
