i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
