I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
