So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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