as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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