We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
