She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
