The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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