if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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