She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
handjob tips. give me some.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
