The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
