Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
