Duck Duck Cougar?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
