I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
