I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
So vagazzling was a success
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