one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I am spending my child support on dildos
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
