Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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