D3 body, D1 cock
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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