I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
