Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
handjob tips. give me some.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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