Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
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