Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
