like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
