i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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