Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize