I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
