she looked like the before picture.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
